漠然

有些事情太无畏
没有必要说出来

有些事情太正经
没有场合去议论

有些事情太私密
没有办法去剖白

有些事情太复杂
没有能力去表达

最后总是

开不了口
动不了手

心虽动 口不动 手不动
称之为冷淡

漠然_

and hatred arises_

i hate it.

i hate how you make me doubt myself. i hate how foolish all my acts seem. i hate how you make me ponder over every little thing. i hate how you make me reduce myself to comparing with insignificant others.

i hate my inability to shut it all out.

i just hate it all.

不过是幻觉

每每在听歌之后
心里总会承载满满的情绪
大脑会不自觉制造很多假象

就像现在 我自以为我嫉妒
但 也不过是幻觉_

Screwed_

I think I am depressed over my results deep down inside.

A stain. Dirt. Result of my overwhelming laziness.

And talking about it while trying to sound like i'm totally fine about it just makes me all the more depressed.

I think I screwed myself. Totally.

vague mode ON

why am i changing myself due to your mere comment?

c'mon,
i KNOW this is no good.

i can SO do better than this.

let's play it cool.
play vague.